Whilst the debate over compulsory sex education for children continues there is one question that continually comes to the forefront of my mind.
‘If sex-and-relationship education were to become compulsory in all schools, what difference would this make to ensuring that all children have safe, happy childhoods without fear of abuse?’
It is a sad fact of life that, whether they want it or not, far too many children are subjected to a level of ’sex’ education in their young lives that no sane, decent, person would ever wish on anyone, no matter what their age.
Such ‘education’ at the hands of their abusers, more often than not someone from their own family or known to them, can have a life-long devastating impact on their lives.
Whilst I have concerns as to how our hard-pushed education system would cope with the additional burden that some would like to thrust upon them, there is also the issue of where ‘education’ begins and parenting stops.
In the past, sex education would have been pretty much a hit and miss affair; mum talking in hushed tones about periods and the obligations of the marital role, but probably not until the time arrived. Whilst dad, trying not to feel embarrassed, would have a ‘manly’ chat about ‘being careful’ and the use of ‘protection’.
All but the most sheltered of children now have access to a wide range of channels through which to learn the facts of life; not all of them desirable by any stretch of the imagination.
It is the prevalence of ‘online’ grooming and the subsequent exploitation of our youngsters that is proving to be one of the most invidious invasions into our everyday lives.
In the past, there would have been a number of stable role models in a young person’s life, there to listen and offer guidance at crucial times in their development, but sadly modern day life has moved on from the secure environment enjoyed by many. This very lack of stability makes our children more vulnerable to the attentions of undesirable predators.
Children develop and mature at different rates and my fear is that if we attempt to formalise sex-and-relationship education we are assuming, quite wrongly, a one-size fits all approach. Yes, such knowledge is vitally important in preparing young people for life, but the desire by some to make it a compulsory part of the school curriculum may not be the answer. We all know too that exploring something in a classroom environment is a totally different ballgame to being out there on the streets, feeling vulnerable and unloved when some ‘kind person’ comes along to offer comfort, understanding, a small gift or two, in exchange for who knows what.
We can talk all we want about ‘acceptable behaviour’ and ‘setting boundaries’ but it is a brave child indeed who comes forward when they have been the unwitting victim of someone’s unwelcome attentions.
Thankfully we now live in a society where things can be discussed in the open, but what we cannot so easily guard against are those individuals, who because of their own failings, continue to prey on the most vulnerable in our society.
I do not have any answers, but the one thing I am certain of is that there is no substitute for each and every one of us to remain on the alert and vigilant if there is to be any hope of our children having the safe, secure upbringing they deserve.
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