I’m just a girl who, no matter how hard I try, can’t seem to say no. Over the years I appear to have got myself involved, sometimes inadvertently, in a whole range of different activities, both professionally and socially. At times it can be a source of great pleasure to be in the thick of things, even if it means burning the candle at both ends.
Such activity has provided me with the opportunity for many new life enhancing experiences and has brought with it along the way some lasting friendships.
I don’t usually start out meaning to be the renegade in any group. Overall I have very traditional views on most things, even if on occasion I choose to express my thoughts and opinions in unconventional ways. This can result in me, on a fairly regular basis, finding I’ve got myself into hot water, again.
However, I am increasingly beginning to dread hearing words along the lines of ‘We’ve always done it that way’, or ‘So and so is the one who always does that.’
I am firmly of the opinion that it provides for a much more positive outlook in life to look at ways of achieving progress, rather than having the more common, and more negative, approach of finding reasons not to do something.
Whether it is a local government department, a business, or charitable organisation, there are always those who are intent on providing a stumbling block to change, however large or small. I do believe that traditions are important, particularly when it comes to our cultural heritage, but to hang onto outdated customs and practices through nothing more than a fear of change, cannot be good for either the organisation or those engaged in it.
I raise the issue because on several occasions recently I have witnessed a number of intelligent, decent people get their knickers in a right old twist over issues that in the overall scheme of things really cannot be that important. I can’t help but think that all of the time and energy they expend, along with the increasingly passionate language used to argue their point, could be better spent on more useful activities.
Once they have the bit between their teeth the matter appears to take on a life of its own, out of all proportion to its real value. I can well imagine the matter being referred to years from now, as in ‘Do you remember the time when....?’
Closer to home, I can accept the argument that a bit of routine in procedure can be an excellent discipline to adopt. This is especially true where bringing up children is concerned. At such a young age, without some level of order to their lives, with clear boundaries of accepted behaviour, many will be unable to function effectively as adults. That is precisely my problem. I know full well where the boundaries lie in most situations, but am at a loss to understand why many of them are there.
Many years ago, my then mother-in-law, who I was very fond of, always cooked the same food on the same day of the week, and served it at the same time; the ‘If it is Friday it must be fish’ syndrome. Likewise, there are those who take the same two weeks holiday every year, stay at the same place, and do the same things. This approach is completely anathema to me.
I realise that I am probably the odd-ball here, but I can’t think of anything that I do regularly, except attend meetings, the timing of which is usually out of my control. I realise that my peripatetic life is a source of frustration to those who wish to plan 12 months ahead, but without the freedom to take advantage of opportunities that arise I would never have been able to experience all that life has to offer.
Rules are not necessarily made to be broken, but what we should do is to question the need for them in the first place. Is it to satisfy someone else’s urge for control, or will harm be caused if they are not in place? I took the decision long ago to not get worked up by anything without first asking myself ‘Is this life or death?’ If the answer is no, which it invariably is, then I am happy to let the angst experienced by others pass me by.
I do however always carry my passport and toothbrush with me; just in case I have the opportunity to enjoy a spur of the moment exotic weekend away; taking advantage of the offer, where someone else has to decline, because their ordered life means that they can’t, because ‘We always go to my mum’s for lunch on a Sunday.’
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