SORRY – MY VIEW

As a keen Scrabble player, and writer, I am naturally interested in words and their meanings.

It has not escaped my notice that unlike the words in Elton John’s 1976 hit ‘It seems to me that sorry it the hardest word to say’, ‘sorry’ now trips off the tongues of those holding public office, along with celebrities, bankers and their ilk, almost daily, and hence has lost both its meaning and impact.

The media gets itself into a frenzy when someone is deemed not be ‘sorry’ for what they’ve done. I would argue strongly that it is not the voicing of an expression of regret that counts, but the actions that follow.

Whether it is someone who has been guilty of prolonged abuse, or caught with their fingers in the till; or a politician inflating, or wrongly claiming, expenses, or coercing their wife to take the points on their driving licence, sorry just isn’t good enough.

What they really mean is that that they are sorry they were caught; entirely another thing altogether.

Much depends on the company we keep; it is well documented that those labelled a ‘bad lot’ often hang out with like-minded people, reinforcing their behaviour.

I doubt any of us can claim to be whiter than white, but on those occasions where I have truly been sorry, it is more likely to have been as a result of something I had not done or said, rather than something I had done, or at the very least, a spontaneous, one off, thoughtless word or deed.

In almost all the high profile cases we hear of, the person concerned has consistently lied and cheated over a period of time; a conscious process, knowing full well what they are doing.

We all make mistakes, but if we really are sorry we learn from the experience and rectify our ways. On many occasions I have had cause to reflect on things, and in doing so have tried to modify my behaviour accordingly, hoping to come out of it a better person.

Nowadays I actively seek out the company of those that I look up to, with the values that really matter in our society. As a publicly appointed governor of a hospital, I aim to subscribe to the seven ‘Nolan’ principles of public life - Selflessness, Integrity, Objectivity, Accountability, Openness, Honesty, Leadership.

On a final note, I can still recall the occasion at junior school when I was asked to write a poem. Being hopeless at verse I copied a poem I had found in a book. My then teacher, who I adored, asked me time and time again, if I had written the poem myself and I swore blind I had, to the bitter end. It was only many years later I realised that it was a popular verse, well known by all, except me. Almost 50 years later the shame is tangible, along with the sorrow and stupidity of thinking I could fool her.

As long as these feelings stay with me, I know I am on the right track, far from perfect, a work in progress.